I'm worried. What am I worried about? Just read the title. :)
Note: This is long. I've got a lot on my mind and I want to get it out. Nothing too depressing, but if you want to skip this, that's ok. :)
Swine flu!
So I had a dr's appointment yesterday afternoon. The baby is fine. All they did was listen for the heartbeat. It was there! Such a reassuring sound. I am now 15 weeks pregnant.
I asked my doctor what she thought about this swine flu vaccine. She said "they are recommending it because of all the complications in pregnant women." I told her I was leery of it. I think it has been rushed, they don't know what the side effects are, and I'm not so sure I want it. Thankfully, she agreed with me! Well, not technically, but her expression changed and she said she definitely understood my position.
I tried looking up information on the internet. I know.....not so smart. Actually, it didn't scare me. I found a lot of places where people commented that they weren't going near the vaccine. I was trying to find updated data, but most of the articles that came up on Google were dated back in July. The best statistic I could find in more than one place was this: Of the 266 deaths from the swine flu that they have well-documented, 6% were pregnant women. Since pregnant women make up about 1% of the population, they (we) are overrepresented in deaths from swine flu. I assume they have done a study and found that, with a 95% confidence interval, this fact is statistically significant. (See, I DID learn something at my first job!)
They are expecting doses of it at the end of the month so I guess I will wait until then to finally decide what I'm going to do.
Asthma!
Beta had an asthma attack today. It came on very suddenly. I had picked the girls up from school. We went to Harp's to buy Harper a Halloween costume. :) (I'll post pics sometime) Then we went to Sonic to get $1 vanilla ice cream cones. (I was craving soft serve....) Right as we got home and walked in the door, Beta started crying. She said her throat hurt and it hurt bad! I wasn't really sure what to do. She went to the bathroom and sat down. I had her drink some water. She said it had really not hurt until she ate the ice cream. Weird. She also started that high, dry cough. Uh oh. I got the inhaler we still have (thankfully) and used it. Within about a minute, she seemed better and wasn't coughing. Within 5 minutes, she was back to her normal self.
She had another episode right before bedtime. She was chasing Alpha through the house trying to dry her wet face on Alpha's pajamas. (I run a tight ship around here, can't you tell?) She slipped on the floor and fell down. For some reason, this started her coughing again. I took her to the bathroom to calm down. Once again we used the inhaler and it seemed to help. By then, though, she just felt awful. So I got her in bed as quickly as I could. I plan to check on her a bunch.
So now I don't know what to do. She first had asthma when she was 3. It has practically gone away. She is not on any daily medicine. She has needed her inhaler a handful of times. Once was back in the spring. Now it's the fall. There must be something that causes it, but we haven't figured out what that is yet. I will probably take her to the doctor tomorrow and see what he has to say. We may be on antibiotics and steroids again. Sigh. I just can't stand it when my babies hurt. Especially when it is kinda scary for me, too.
Then in my readings about swine flu, I run across this wonderful gem. Swine flu is usually pretty mild in children unless they have an underlying medical condition LIKE ASTHMA!!!! Stupid internet.
Tornado!
The girls wanted to make cupcakes for dessert. So we did. They wanted to decorate them with sprinkles. Ugh. I hate sprinkles. I don't like eating them or cleaning them up. I also didn't feel like making a powdered sugar glaze. So Jim kindly offered to go buy some frosting at the grocery store down the street. While he was there, he called me. "Get the girls and go into your closet. There is a tornado coming on [big street we live near]. I'll be home as soon as I can."
I'm like, what? It had been kinda sunny before it got dark. So I grab the girls, who were getting done with their showers, call Harper, and shoo everyone into our bedroom. I turn on the TV. Dan Skoff is on there giving instructions. He mentions our street again and the girls school!!! He says if you are in these areas to TAKE COVER IMMEDIATELY!!! Well, I don't want to scare anybody. So we just continue combing and drying hair. Jim gets home a few minutes later. Instead of stupidly standing outside looking for a tornado (it was dark), we stupidly stand there listening to Dan Skoff! Until the rain fade knocks out our satellite signal.
Long story short, if there was a tornado, it passed over us. The KNWA storm spotter didn't see one. He said there had been rotation but nothing ever dipped down. By 8:00, the tornado warning was over and the storm had moved on to the east. Well, the tornado-producing part of it anyway. We are still having major rain and thunder even now at 10:30 pm.
I probably scared the girls. But they wouldn't be quiet so that we could hear the tv. So I told them that we might have a tornado. Not a good idea......Thankfully they didn't panic. Just cried a little bit. I never know where to draw the line between not-scaring them and letting them know when things are truly getting serious. It helped that we were all crammed in our bed watching the news. :)
So my worries for the day started out fairly remote: swine flu in pregnant women. Then I have the very real possibility of an asthma recurrence. THEN, forget all that! I have the VERY VERY REAL possibility of dying in a tornado this very night! I guess it kinda puts things in perspective. I mean, why be fearful of swine flu when there are tornados about? I probably have a better chance of getting killed in a car accident on the way to work tomorrow than of dying from swine flu.
I keep trying to repeat this verse to myself over and over.
2 Timothy 1:7
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.
I'm not sure if that scripture exactly fits, but going through my mind all day has been "God has not given us a spirit of fear....." So I'm trying not to be afraid.
But it's hard.
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